More Dreams of late.

30 01 2006

I didn’t get a chance to write this one down when I woke up today, but heres what I remember.

I was Eric Bana as The Incredible Hulk. I was hiding in a house. There was cheesecake. Thats all I got.

Amazing how much you CAN’T remember your dreams the longer your awake. Since there was cheesecake, I can only assume that the Golden Girls were there. Perhaps Blanche was being a slut. I honestly can’t remember.


Dreams of late.

28 01 2006

Lately, I’ve been having these crazy dreams. I say lately, because my whole life I never really had crazy dreams, just super short segments of dreams that made no sense. Now I’m having dreams with plots, characters, and a budget. Heres the latest.

Myself, Corinne, and somebody else (possibly Maggie) are entering Lowe’s for whatever reason. The two girls seem to be dressed up all goofy, like it’s the future from Back to the Future II. I can’t tell what I’m wearing (I am not naked though). The third person who may or may not be Maggie says that me and Corinne’s anniversary is coming up. Corinne agrees, and proceeds to buy US a Lowe’s gift card. I verbally berate Corinne, explaining how its not cool for her to buy US a Lowe’s gift card that I’ll inevitably end up using to buy crap to fix OUR house. Its like buying expensive tools for your wife for her birthday, just so you can use them and had a good excuse to buy them.

Anyway, as the Lowe’s merchant hands the gift card to Corinne (apparently I lost that fight) in a small brown bag (weird place for a gift card), A guy reaches over both of us and takes the bag, then proceeds to run out of the store. This guy is unknown to all of us, but I got the impression that I’ve seen him before (in reality, not in my dream). He reminds me of the guy that I saw the other night working one of the beer booths at the Save Mart Center, and I remember this same guy from a Biology class I had over the summer at FCC. He’s got some kind of vision problem, and it appears as though his eyes are always darting around looking for something to focus on. He would use a little telescope in class to read the front board. And now that I think about it, I have delivered pizza to this guy too, he had a fairly upscale house (or at least his parents do). He has never recognized me outside of the classroom, even though we have exchanged a few words in class. I blame this on his poor eyesight, along with the fact that I look different now then I did during that class.

So this guy with the shifty eyes grabs the bag containing the gift cards and runs out the door. I shout out “Stop!” or “Get Him!” or something like that, and either a Lowe’s employee or a security guard realize what’s happening and start the chase. The shifty eyed guy (I wish I could remember his name, I used to know it) gets in a large truck, like an F-150 or an Explorer, and starts weaving through the parking lot trying to escape. Now there are other security guards and possibly cops chasing this guy through the parking lot. I’m chasing this guy on foot, because he’s not driving that fast seeing as how it’s a fairly crowded parking lot. It seems to be the parking lot outside of Target in River Park, not the one outside of Lowe’s.

Next thing that happens is the guy backs into a space trying to turn around, and a cop runs up to his window and stops him. I’m still running up to Read the rest of this entry »

Why Europeans Hate Americans

27 01 2006

It occurred to me today that the reason most Europeans don’t like the United States is because we’re not supposed to be here. When Europeans “discovered” these lands, they were looking for a sea route to Asia. What they found, was a big ass continent that blocked any western passage from Europe to Asia. For a while, they hoped that everything they found was an island, and that eventually they would find a way past everything and end up in the Pacific ocean. No such luck.

So when Europeans dislike Americans, its not because were ethnocentric assholes, its because as a continent, were preventing them from getting the spices for their tainted meat products.

Out of the closet.

9 01 2006

At long last, I have come out of the closet. Come out of the closet as in I finished renovating it, not that other thing.

This is what it looked like when we bought the place. Well, it was probably full of garbage, I can’t remember. Everything else was, so why not the closet? The rack you see is just like the one on the other wall that you cant see, just as is the upper shelving. And the paint job on the wall? Thats how it was, bare plaster with some patches where somebody probably tried to hammer in a nail where there was no stud.

This is what I have created. I fixed the random holes in the walls and painted the space all the same color (Callalilly semi-gloss). I put the racks on one side, leaving the other side open for lots of shelving, and I left a space on the end for the vacccuum (sic) cleaner and other such tall storeables. Well, not really. I just didn’t have the means to make the shelving go all the way across to the other door jam, so I left a 16 inch gap of shelves. Yes, it was all part of my master plan.

This is what the living room (formerly the “front room”) looked like when we got the house. Its also what it looks like when a bad photographer takes pictures.


All I did recently was refinish the hardwood floor, move the cable TV outlet, and replace the old electrical outlets and switches. But now, this is the living room. The new door was put in by contractors, I don’t mess with doors. Yes, the room is messy, but people live here. Again, El Chupacabra is in the picture.

During this break from school, I had four major goals. Refinish the hardwood floor in the “front room,” renovate the closet, renovate the kitchen, and put a roof on the porch. I have completed three of the four. I have already pulled out the old cabinets, put in the new ones, and I am waiting on my kitchen counter top to be delivered, and until then I can put fake hardwood over the real hardwood that is covered with alternating layers of asbestos tile and lynn-o-lee-um (sic).
Yeah, the roof on the porch is done (Thanks Anthony), but its not much to look at, so I didn’t take any pictures of it (its a roof, it’s not like you can see it unless you’re on the roof).